Annie's mailbox july 3 2008

A blast from the past!

Annie's Mailbox is a popular advice column written by Ann Landers (Esther Pauline Friedman) and later by her daughter Margo Howard. Here's the July 3, 2008, column:

Dear Annie

I'm a 35-year-old woman who has been married to my high school sweetheart for 15 years. We have two beautiful children together, and I thought our marriage was happy and fulfilling. However, over the past year, I've noticed that my husband has become increasingly distant and uninterested in our relationship. He's always busy with work or watching TV, and we rarely have quality time together.

I've tried talking to him about it, but he just says he's stressed and needs some space. I feel like I'm losing my partner and best friend. I love him, but I don't know how much longer I can keep going like this.

Dear Frustrated

It sounds like you're feeling lonely and disconnected from your husband. It's not uncommon for couples to drift apart over time, especially with the demands of work and family life. However, it's great that you're recognizing the problem and wanting to address it.

First, I want to encourage you to keep communicating with your husband. It's essential to express your feelings and needs to each other. Try to have a specific conversation about what you're feeling and what you need from him. Be specific about what you want to change and how you want to reconnect.

Second, consider scheduling regular date nights or activities that you both enjoy. This can help you reconnect and create positive memories together.

Lastly, don't forget to take care of yourself. Make time for your own hobbies, interests, and friendships. This will help you maintain your sense of identity and self-worth, even if your marriage isn't perfect.

Remember, relationships take work and effort from both partners. I hope you and your husband can work together to strengthen your bond and find happiness again.

Dear Annie

I'm a 25-year-old woman who recently started dating a 30-year-old man. We've been together for a few months, and everything seems great. However, I've noticed that he's been acting really possessive and jealous. He gets upset if I talk to other guys, even if it's just a casual conversation. He also checks my phone and computer frequently, and gets angry if I don't answer his calls or texts right away.

I'm starting to feel like I'm in a relationship with a control freak. I love him, but I don't want to feel like I'm trapped or suffocated. How can I deal with this situation?

Dear Possessive

It sounds like you're feeling suffocated and trapped in your relationship. Possessiveness and jealousy are not healthy traits in a partner, and it's essential to address this issue before it becomes a bigger problem.

First, have an open and honest conversation with your partner about how his behavior is making you feel. Be specific about what you're experiencing and how it's affecting your relationship.

Second, set some boundaries. Let your partner know that you're not comfortable with him checking your phone or computer, and that you need some space and independence in the relationship.

Lastly, consider seeking counseling or therapy together. A professional can help you both work through these issues and develop healthier communication patterns.

Remember, you deserve to feel respected and valued in your relationship. Don't settle for anything less.

That's it for this week's column!