Emotional blackmail and gaslighting

A very important topic!

Emotional blackmail and gaslighting are two tactics that can be used to manipulate and control others, often in a subtle and insidious way. Here's a breakdown of each:

Emotional Blackmail

Emotional blackmail is a form of manipulation where someone uses guilt, anger, self-pity, or other emotions to control or influence another person's behavior. The goal is to make the other person feel responsible for the emotional well-being of the manipulator, and to get them to do what the manipulator wants.

Examples of emotional blackmail include:

• Threatening to end a relationship or self-harm if the other person doesn't comply with a demand
• Making someone feel guilty for not meeting an expectation or fulfilling a need
• Using anger or aggression to intimidate or control someone
• Playing the victim to elicit sympathy and get what you want

Gaslighting

Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation where someone makes someone question their own sanity, memory, or perception. The goal is to make the other person doubt their own reality and conform to the manipulator's version of events.

Examples of gaslighting include:

• Denying previous agreements or conversations
• Blaming the victim for the manipulator's behavior
• Minimizing or trivializing the victim's feelings or concerns
• Making someone feel like they're overreacting or being too sensitive
• Changing the subject or avoiding accountability

Red Flags

Here are some common red flags that may indicate emotional blackmail or gaslighting:

• Feeling anxious, guilty, or responsible for someone else's emotions
• Feeling like you're walking on eggshells to avoid conflict
• Feeling like you're being manipulated or controlled
• Feeling like you're not being heard or understood
• Feeling like you're being blamed for someone else's problems
• Feeling like you're being gaslighted or having your reality distorted

How to Protect Yourself

To protect yourself from emotional blackmail and gaslighting, consider the following strategies:

1. Set boundaries: Establish clear limits and communicate them assertively.
2. Practice self-care: Take care of your physical, emotional, and mental well-being.
3. Seek support: Surround yourself with people who support and validate you.
4. Don't internalize: Recognize that the manipulator's behavior is not your fault.
5. Document: Keep a record of events, conversations, and agreements to help you remember what happened.
6. Seek professional help: Consider therapy or counseling to develop coping strategies and build resilience.

Remember, emotional blackmail and gaslighting are not acceptable behaviors. You deserve to be treated with respect, empathy, and honesty.